Tuesday, 30 December 2008
To anyone who wants me to have a party:
sorry i can't have one, okay? it's not that I don't want to see you guys, but if you are so eager to see me, why don't you invite me out or something? as you know, i'm moving to a new country next year. there's difficulty and a lot of things to do in preparation for it. it isn't just about being excited and having fun. it's applying for visas, and filling in forms and screwing them up and filling them in again, planning time, making copies of documents and getting paperwork signed by lawyers, preparing to adapt to a new environment, buying books and uniforms, air tickets, shopping for everything you need there, making sure you don't leave anything behind and a hell lot of mental preparation lah. it's really worrisome, like what if i can't cope, what if i go there and find that everyone's smarter than me, the different climate which means needing new clothes so i don't die and everything. it's not like i can just fly there and everything will be ready for me, right? i'm busy, okay, even though you may not be, and you may not be experiencing and may never experience it the same way i do, but this is what I am going through and i don't have the time to plan a freaking party for you. you may not have anything to do but i do. people don't plan their own farewell parties, you know. and if i have a party, who is going to help me? nobody. i am busy enough as it is.
btw, this is all in good nature. if you were a real friend i'm sure you would understand.
you are at the top of my lungs,
drawn to the ones who never yawn.
19:03